Exams and tests are a challenging part of school life for students of all ages. Children worry that if they perform poorly on a test, they’ll disappoint their parents, or be judged by their friends, or maybe even miss out on the college they really want. And while a certain amount of stress is normal and expected, extended periods of this or excessive stress can have negative effects on the student’s performance and overall well-being.
In this article, we’ll discuss the signs of exam stress and ways you can help them through it.
“Anxiety also has the potential to shut you down,” explains neuropsychologist Ken Schuster, PsyD. “When kids are having test anxiety they can’t think clearly, they can’t judge things the way they could if they weren’t anxious. All of your other abilities get clouded up by anxiety.”
Signs of Exam Stress
Outbursts and mood swings are more likely to happen as a test day approaches, but there are several other signs to look out for that can tell you if your child is facing more pressure or anxiety than usual:
- Not eating or eating too much
- Irregular sleeping patterns
- Worrying too much
- Irritability or low mood
- Stomach aches
If your child shows some or all these signs, this would be a good time to teach them how to manage their stress for help now and in the future.
Helping Children Cope with Exam Stress
Here are some of the ways you can help your student manage or overcome test anxiety:
1. Keep track of their eating and sleeping habits
If your child is stressed about an exam, they may skip lunch or stay up late into the night to study. Lack of sleep coupled with a bad diet is detrimental to your child’s physical and mental well-being. Ensure they eat all their meals and get 8-9 hours of sleep daily. A healthy diet and a good night’s sleep can help your student stay sharp and focused, and ensures they’ll have all the nutrients required for their brain and body to keep up with the demands of daily life.
2. Make sure they go out, take breaks, and meet with their friends regularly
When stressed about an exam, some children may see socializing or taking regular breaks as a waste of time. But studying for hours and not giving the brain some rest doesn’t work. The brain needs time to process the information and rest properly to refocus and recall later.
3. Ease up on daily chores
Your child will be busy preparing for their exam. It’s best at this time to let them prioritize studying over doing house chores. For example, if their room is messy, instead of asking them to clean it, you could help them clean it this time or let it be messy for another day.
4. Talk to them
Talking them through their nerves and asking why they feel pressured can help you understand how they perceive this exam and why it has them worried.
After discovering their concerns, you can guide them out of their anxiety in a healthy way. If they are uncomfortable talking to you, suggest they speak to someone else, like a friend, sibling, or teacher. The important thing here is that they speak to someone about their true feelings and let those emotions out. Sometimes talking about your anxieties can help you realize you might be making a mountain out of a molehill.
5. Provide support, not criticism
The child already feels the pressure. After they open up to you about their worries, it is best to avoid criticizing their methods or invalidating their feelings. Instead, listen with an open mind and suggest ways to help them in an encouraging, thoughtful manner.
6. Help them study or find a tutor
When you talk to them, you’ll discover where their stress stems from. If they feel unable to cope with their studies alone, you can offer to help. They could study with you or ask a classmate taking the same test. Studying together, either with you, a classmate, or a tutor, can help your child clarify doubts, alleviating some anxiety. It can also make them feel like they’re not in this alone.
7. Let them vent
After their exam is over, discuss it with them. Let them vent if needed. Whatever their emotions are—disappointment, anger, embarrassment, or bravado—accept them. Their feelings are what they are; they are neither right nor wrong. There will be plenty of opportunities for conversations later, so refrain from making judgments or offering solutions.
An important thing to remember is that exams are simply a measure of their progress in a subject. It doesn’t define who they are, and it shouldn’t take such a toll on their physical or mental well-being. Performing poorly on an exam isn’t the end of the world!
Key Takeaways
- Extended periods of stress can be counter-productive and detrimental to your child’s performance on the test, and overall well-being.
- Keep an eye out for signs of excessive stress, such as irregular eating and sleeping patterns, worrying too much, irritability or low mood, and stomach aches.
- Help manage the child’s test anxiety by encouraging regular breaks and socializing, easing up on chores, providing support rather than criticism, and helping them study or seek a tutor if needed.
- After the exam, acknowledge and support the child’s feelings, whether they are favorable or not, and reassure them that the exam does not define their worth or future success.
Tutoring Can Help
Our caring and knowledgeable staff will work one-on-one with your child to discuss their worries about an upcoming test. We can navigate them through the material to help them understand it better, building their confidence and taking some of that stress away.